What is it with the PSP? Or more importantly, what is it with designers who think they can port over an old PlayStation game, re-jig the controls, add a few extra features and think this is a suitable title for the handheld? At over two years old you would have thought by now designers would've understood what works what doesn't and more importantly why. Sadly, this doesn't seem to the case with the release of Tenchu: Time of the Assassins.

Tenchu is a stealth game series that has appeared four times across a number of systems. The original was created for the PlayStation in 1998, followed by a sequel (Birth of the Stealth Assassins) in 2000, before making the leap to the PlayStation 2 in 2003's Wrath of Heaven and follow-up Return from Darkness in 2004. None of these games set the gaming world alight with our own Geoff Holland describing Wrath of Heaven as "uninspired and a little overcomplicated", so I had little faith that this would overcome Liberty City Stories as the essential PSP game to own… and it doesn't. The fact is that Time of the Assassins makes the mediocre Prince of Persia and Pirates of the Caribbean look like Ocarina of Time.

The phrase 'multiple storylines' usually translates to me as 'value for money', but in the case of this game it's like 'super-size' translates as 'heart disease'. Each character has their own storyline, specific levels and tasks that must be completed, but instead of a team of literary geniuses creating one perfect storyline, it feels like one overworked writer spent five minutes on every level. Because of this I found no enjoyment in playing the game with one character and felt no inclination to put myself through it again. Even if you are curious, I would recommend that you don't bother, as the only difference between the characters is the replacement of a few key elements, enemies and goals across every level (think the South Park spoof of Family Guy writers!)

Upon starting up the game I was (as with Prince of Persia) blown away by the visuals on offer, with a story told in cut-scenes and Street Fighter-style comic shots, but having learnt from the past experience, graphics and cut-scenes mean nothing when it comes to the gameplay; what we have here is a game that is simply no fun to play at all. Taking control of Rikimaru, Ayame, Rin or Tesshu (later your foe Onikage is playable in his own story mode) you must deliver a stick to the Emperor. Yes, it goes a bit deeper than that, but the cut and dry of it is that you are delivering a stick. Things are intensely difficult from the start and this saps what little fun there is at the beginning - it's almost impossible to complete one level without a restart or death.

As you play, you follow the simple principle of sneaking around the level, finding an object and then finding the exit. Scattered throughout each level is a number of guards who you must either sneak past or subdue using your alleged ninja-stealth abilities. I say 'alleged' because it's practically impossible to perform any stealth moves in this stealth game. At times I felt that this was my fault and that I simply was unable to get to grips with the controls - so I practiced until I knew how to do certain moves, but it didn't help, as the controls physically won't allow you to carry out the moves and this negates one of the major selling points of Tenchu, namely achieving Stealth Kills. One other main factor that is impossible to ignore is the completely useless camera that can't be controlled in any way other than to centre the view with a press of the R button. As you play, the game helpfully gives you a ki meter that lets you know how far away a target is, but this is pointless if you are then unable to see whether he is behind you, in front of you or in the next screen and even if you do achieve it, the awesome SK animation that the box advertises is usually hidden because the camera has decided to give you a view of the wall!

After all this, surely the idea of hacking up an army of opponents is fun? Well, unfortunately it's not and this can be a real problem if the main focus of the game is that you are a samurai warrior, with warrior being the key word here. Each character has the same basic move set and it's only the use of weaponry that makes any real difference. Before each level you are given a number of items, weapons, potions and so forth that can help you during play; that is they should help you, but they don't. The awkward use of the D-Pad to scroll through these items that all look the same doesn't help you in any way and it's doubtful that you'll actually use any of them. Fighting is as awkward as most movement and the damage you cause seems to change for no reason - one minute an overhead swing with your sword takes away half of your opponent's energy and the next time you try it, it does nothing. The same goes for your own life and you once again can't figure out how many hits you can take before you have to start again.

Once completed you have a map editor to play with, which if you actually create a decent level can be swapped with other people, but this is a feature that should always be confined to PC games, where a mouse and bigger screen can be used. Also included is a poorly executed multiplayer mode that allows you to play a co-operative level, but this is far too difficult and makes the experience a pointless one, with none of the flair and style of Full Spectrum Warrior for example. The fact that there are so many extras doesn't change my opinion of the game; it actually reinforces it, because even if you managet to complete the full game and unlock the plethora of playable characters available, it's doubtful that you'll use any of them except for the fantastic Kumagorou. Why is he fantastic? Well, Kumagorou happens to be a bear and this is so surreal, but actually more fun to play than most of the logical characters on offer (take note SEGA!) I am a very forgiving gamer and can forgive many flaws. I'll overlook terrible graphics, sound or lack of replayability if the game is playable to begin with. Games that can only really be played through once, such as Second Sight, still gained favourable reviews everywhere, while games that are so hard as to cause brain damage such as F-Zero GX and Ninja Gaiden are considered some of the best in existence. This is because they are great fun to play to begin with - but Tenchu isn't. Looking at the whole package of extras, it has the feel that SEGA knew Tenchu was no good and so piled everything in to make it seem less worthless. It's like twelve hours of special features for the Alone in the Dark movie - it's a nice gesture, but no one actually wants it.

Tenchu: Time of the Assassin is a complete waste of money and looking back at the past 1000 words I see that I have had to mention you can play as a bear to get any enjoyment at all! Instead of being an antidote to all the awful walk and hack games that have plagued the PSP, Tenchu is a lethal injection of cyanide. My best advice is to wait for Metal Gear Solid and hope that Konami gets it right - considering their track record I'll be amazed if it's anything short of a Liberty City beater…

Reviewed by David Simpson for AceGamez (All Rights Reserved).