Now, here's one beach that I wouldn't mind getting a sandy crotch for, and that's the women-only beach in Italy, cutely named the Pink Beach. When Lara Croft isn't celebrating her anniversary by raiding tombs, she's lending her blue breasts to other pressing issues, in this case, it's opening a beach. The beach opening was held in conjunction with Miss Muretto, a beauty contest held yearly and similar to the Miss Italy contest but for younger girls. The new 'Pink Beach' is an exclusive area on the beachfront which will now be completely off-limits to men, allowing ladies to relax and tan themselves without having to fend off any unwanted attention. The beach opening was broadcast across Italy to 10 million people on the national news.

I don't like the word can't. And can't is directly related to the phase "off limits" - and when we can't have something, or can't go somewhere, well - it's basic male impulse. We want it more. So, tone up, wig on, infiltrate Pink Beach as one of those annoying parasol sellers, or in this case, Pink Parasol sellers, take pictures, and report back to AceGamez with your findings. As for me, well, I'll be just around the corner from Pink Beach, at Italy's Mama Mia Pizzeria, where I expect they'll be selling Lara Croft pasta shapes. Yummy.

Beach Raider - in stores soon!